These seemingly good habits might be scaring off your best team members. Here’s how to avoid them.
Halloween is right around the corner, and soon, kids will head out into the night with one familiar phrase: “Trick or treat!”
It got me thinking: leadership is also full of tricks and treats. And sometimes, it’s hard to know the difference between the two.
See, every day, we face small moments that test the kind of leader we are. And in those moments, it’s easy to reach for the “tricks” — surface-level responses that feel like good leadership, but that ultimately don’t give our people what they want.
We’ve got to look past those tricks and instead treat our team to more thoughtful and intentional responses. Sure, it takes more effort, but it’s also how you build the kind of trust, clarity, and purpose that strong teams thrive on.
So in honor of trick-or-treat season, here are four common ways leaders get “tricked” by surface-level habits — and how to treat your team to the kind of intentional, full-size leadership they deserve.
🧙 Trick: Asking for Feedback
🍫 Treat: Following Up on It
Asking your team for feedback seems like a good idea, right? It shows you’re humble, curious, and interested in your team’s thoughts.
But there’s a catch.
They need you to follow up on it. When your people take the time to share feedback but then hear nothing back from you, they go from feeling valued to feeling dismissed.
According to Gallup, only 26% of employees believe their feedback leads to meaningful change.
That number makes it clear: listening without action creates skepticism, not engagement.
If you’re going to ask for input, close the loop. Let people know what you heard, what’s changing, and what isn’t. Even when you can’t act on every idea, explaining your decision builds trust and understanding, even when they don’t fully agree.
Reflect: When you ask for feedback, ask yourself: Am I genuinely curious — or just checking a box?
🧙 Trick: Saying “My Door’s Always Open”
🍫 Treat: Making the First Move
At one point, nearly all of us have said it: “My door’s always open.” And with good intentions: you want your team to feel comfortable coming to you.
But most people won’t. They don’t want to take up your time, say the wrong thing, or risk appearing needy.
That’s why “open-door” policies often just create an illusion of accessibility rather than the real thing.
Your people are more likely to share honest feedback when youinitiate the conversation. So if you want to be approachable, be proactive and set the example.
Don’t wait for people to walk through your door. Walk through theirs — literally or figuratively. Ask what’s working, what’s getting in their way, and what you could do better as their leader.
Reflect: Are you truly accessible — or just available?
🧙 Trick: Offering Perks
🍫 Treat: Creating Growth Opportunities
Free snacks, yoga breaks, and coffee bars are fun — and they make for great recruiting photos. But perks wear off fast.
What your team members truly value is growth. A LinkedIn Workplace Learning Report found that 94% of employees say they’d stay longer at a company that invests in their development.
In other words: perks may make people happy, but growth makes them loyal.
It’s fine to invest in those fun perks. Just be sure to also pair them with investments that change careers: coaching, stretch assignments, and opportunities to learn something new.
Those benefits may not show up on your company’s Instagram posts, but they’re the ones that actually retain talent.
Reflect: Are your perks more about fun or fulfillment?
🧙 Trick: Praising Everything Equally
🍫 Treat: Recognizing What’s Truly Excellent
Everybody loves recognition. And it’s vital to a strong culture. In fact, I believe so strongly in the power of recognition that I wrote a whole book on it!
But when every effort gets the same level of praise, it starts to lose its meaning. Your best performers feel unseen, and people don’t understand what the standard of excellence really is.
A recent O.C. Tanner study found that 54% of employees say the recognition they receive feels like an empty gesture. Worse, those employees are far more likely to disengage over time.
That’s why it’s important to be precise with your praise. Recognize effort constantly but be intentional about how you celebrate excellence. Point to the behaviors and outcomes that truly move the organization forward.
That kind of specific, timely recognition lets everyone know what “great” looks like (and prevents recognition from becoming another “trick”).
Reflect: Are you recognizing what’s easy to notice, or what really drives excellence?
Wrapping It Up
At the end of the day, leadership is full of “tricks” that look good. On the surface, they make you seem approachable, engaged, and supportive.
But those surface-level moves can backfire. What feels like good leadership in the moment — feedback, accessibility, perks, and praise — can actually create confusion, disengagement, or frustration.
So as you hand out candy this Halloween, take a moment to think about what you’re handing out at work, too. Are you relying on surface-level tricks, or leading with purpose, follow-through, and meaning?
Your Next Step
Make the How Leaders Lead app part of your daily leadership routine! It’s 100% free to download and use, no catch.